This post may contain affiliate links. Please refer to the disclosure statement for details.
They say that 40 is the new 30, but what does that really mean? I think they say that every ten years, so you don’t feel bad about being a decade older! Being a year and a half into my 40’s, I have to say it’s nothing like my 30’s…THANK GOD!
There is a sense of confidence and calm that comes with 40. Through life experiences, I have learned a lot about myself and who I really am as a person, as a mom, as a wife and a friend. It’s through these experiences over time that I have realized that there are some things that I just don’t care about anymore.
Here is my list of things that I don’t care about now that I am 40!
- Wearing make-up in public – GASP! I know. It’s not that I don’t like wearing make-up. I do wear it on occasion, however, I work from home. Usually no one see’s me but my husband and my kids. I am not going to take time to put make-up on to pick the kids up from school or drop them off at soccer practice. I’m not even going to bother with it to go to the grocery store. I will put on make-up if we are going to dinner or meeting people somewhere. Sometimes I will put it on ‘just because’, but not often!
- Being super social – I have always been a very social person and enjoy doing things with friends or family. However, as I get older, I am becoming more of a home-body. It’s not that I’m anti-social, but my life is so busy already, that I enjoy the quiet of my house a lot more that I used to. Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy a night out with the girls, but I appreciate my nights at home just as much!
- What other people think of me – To be fair, I have never really cared too much about what other people think about me, unless it’s someone that I truly respect. Even as a teenager, I wasn’t too concerned what the other kids thought about me. I was just myself and I was happy with that. However, as you become a mom, there starts to be a lot of judgement from other mom’s (even though there shouldn’t be). There were definitely times that I made decisions because I thought it would be what others accepted. Today, I make decisions for my kids because it’s the best decision for them. Any judgement passed by another mom is not my issue, it’s theirs.
- A tidy house – You would think that I would have given this one up when the kids were young, but nope! I was the crazy mom running around the house putting everything away ‘where it belongs’, yelling at the kids that ‘I wish they would just put their stuff away!’ Looking back, I think it’s because I thought the way my house looked was a reflection of how good of a mom and wife I was. Dumb, right?! These days, my kids are old enough to clean up after themselves. While they aren’t as clean as I would like them to me, it’s their responsibility. I still like a tidy house, don’t get me wrong. It’s just taken almost 15 years for me to take a breath and let it go.
- Acquiring experiences not things – As my children grow, and having one that has already moved out, I gravitate more towards spending money on experiences, rather than ‘things’. Rather a gift, a reward, or something ‘just because’, I would rather have an experience with my family or friends. Trying new things like dancing and skiing, and creating memories with loved ones is my priority.
- My career – I know this one sounds little harsh, but it’s true, for now. Maybe it’s because I’m happy in my job. I love the freedom that working at home allows me and I enjoy what I do. At this point, I am not looking to be a high powered executive (my 20-year-old-self would be having a fit!), but I am happy where I am in corporate education.
- How I look in a bathing suit – This is a huge one for me. I have been self-conscious about what I look like in any type of clothing almost my entire life. And a bathing suit? Forget it! You would never see me just in a bathing suit. I would always have shorts, or a t-shirt or something covering me up. Today, I am confident in my less than perfect body that has stayed strong, attracted by husband and given birth to 2 children! As a matter of fact, I wrote an article about it a few months ago. Check it out! Click here to read the post.
- Mean girls – Yes, they still exist at 40. Sad, right? Most likely they were mean girls in elementary and high school. Now they are still mean girls and their KIDS are in elementary school and high school. Steering clear of these mom’s is towards the top of my list. I used to try to be nice to them for the ‘sake of my kids’. What if my kid liked theirs? I didn’t want them to miss out. Here is what I have learned: If the mom is a mean girl, the kids learn what they see, and chances are, I don’t want my kid hanging out with theirs anyway!
- Negative Friendships – Many of us have relationships that have a negative impact on our lives. The friendship is either high maintenance, encourages us to do things we would rather not to, or in general has a negative impact on our lives. I have made the conscious decision to let go of those relationships and seek out those friendships that uplift me. It can be difficult to pull yourself out of the circle of people or branch out to find new positive friends. I have found that by finding the positive friends, and letting go of the ones that have a negative impact, I am a much happier person.
- Fashion – While I do like to look nice, I have a hard time keeping up with trends. I always seem to be behind the curve of the latest look and I have come to terms with that. I have decided that I just need to be comfortable in what I am wearing. Whether that’s jeans and a T-shirt, a sundress or yoga pants, I’m happy just being me!
- And a bonus one – Being judged – Putting my thoughts and feelings in print can be scary. It took me a while to decide to start this blog, because I was worried what others might think. What I have found through this journey is that I am not worried about others judging me. What I hope to accomplish through this blog is helping others!
I am excited to see what the rest of my 40’s bring. I wonder what I won’t care about in my 50’s!?!